How many of you find it easier to connect guys?
I do. I feel like it’s so much easier. Friendships are easier, based on joking, and having fun, and I always know where I stand with them. Problems are solved with a fistbump or a good natured punch on the arm. They don’t offend easily and their feelings are a bit harder to hurt. Of course, I’m generalizing a bit, but that’s been my experience.
Women absolutely terrify me. I never know what to say, I don’t feel comfortable joking with them unless I know them very well and it’s hard for me to know people unless I am able to joke with them. Once you get past that hurdle there’s the work of keeping the friendship going. Making sure that you don’t commit any of those friendship faux pas that you don’t even know about until you’re confronted with them.
I have a confession.
I’m a little bit wounded.
A few years ago I had a best friend. She introduced me to one of her friends and I became friends with her too. I had a falling out with the best friend and stayed friends with her friend. Imagine my horror and embarrassment when I learned that they were at a get-together one night and thought to entertain everyone by reading my text messages and twitter feed out loud while making fun of me in front of a group of people. My faith in female friendships died in that moment.
I haven’t had a strong female friendship since.
I have been blessed by so many wonderful online friendships and connections but it’s still in the back of mind: don’t get too close, don’t get too attached.
I’ve had a surprising revelation lately.
I want, I need, to heal that wound. I want, and need, to help others heal that wound. It’s been in my head for the last few weeks, start a Woman’s Circle. To which I answer back, “I’m afraid”. What if I do it and the fear overwhelms me and I quit? What if I’m just not cut out for it? What if I won’t be good at it? What if I’m meant to be a lone ranger? What if…
Gotta push past the fear right? Especially when you know it feels like it’s meant to be.
I’ve started a Facebook group, the SoulSisterhood.
An online Women’s Circle. First and foremost I want it to be about forming bonds of friendship and sisterhood. So many women needlessly feel alone and friendless and that’s just plain ridiculous. I also want it to be a safe place to talk about self improvement and our individual journeys.
Big scary dream.
I think the most important thing to remember is that we are all one, we are all part of the whole, we are all connected and a part of each other. There doesn’t have to be distance, there doesn’t have to be hurt, and it is within our power to heal that.