Morning my heart-loves. Today’s card comes from Louise L Hay’s Wisdom Cards and it is something that I’ve wanted to talk about.
“I can not learn other people’s lessons for them. They must do the work themselves, and they will do it when they are ready.”
That’s a tough lesson for me. I want to help people. I want my loved ones to be happy. I also have to allow them to walk their own path. When they’re ready they will do the work, they will take care of their “stuff” it’s not my job to do it for them, as much as I may want to. This lesson reflects back on my word of the year, which is “boundaries”. Every day is a new experience.
You see, I’m a bit of an empath.
What is an empath? An empath is someone who is sensitive to another person’s feelings and emotions. Not just the obvious emotions either, a lot of the time you just know what’s going on underneath. The things that they aren’t showing.
It gives me great insight into people and I feel like it’s a huge advantage in being able to connect with other people.
It can also completely suck.
I pick up moods and feelings very easily and this can be very problematic at times. My good moods drop significantly when being around people who aren’t happy. I feel another’s hurt and pain so clearly sometimes that it becomes my own. This is especially true for people that I am close to. I use to find myself obsessing about their problems, feeling hurt over them, anxious because of them, and racking my brain on how to FIX it.
I was living another person’s issues and feelings and it doesn’t take a genius to figure out that’s a bad idea.
It’s wonderful to want to help your friends, to want to make them happy, to make their life better, but there’s a thin line between supporting someone carrying a burden, helping them to carry a burden, and then trying to take the burden from them and carry it yourself.
You have to let others help themselves.
You can be there to be supportive and encouraging, but it’s something that they have to want for themselves first.