There are a lot of ways to practice forgiveness and I mean a lot. Everyone forgives differently, every situation is different, and the feelings involved are different. Forgiveness is usually a process and usually takes time, but there are things that you can do to help the process along.
Stones and crystals: There are a lot of crystals that can help soothe hurt feelings and aid in forgiveness. You can carry these around with you, meditate with them, or put them on your heart chakra to help aid in forgiveness. Pink calcite, apache tear, sugilite, topaz, peridot, and rose quartz are good stones for this.
Aromatherapy: Essential oils can also help. They’ll relax you and calm you down and help take away a bit of the emotional owie-ness you’re feeling. You can massage yourself with oils like lavender, chamomile, rose, ylang ylang, and bergamot. You can massage these on your belly or your heart or wear them as a perfume.
Sending Love: The ritual of sending love to someone has helped me a lot in certain situations, especially when I am partly to blame for the situation. What you do is you close your eyes and picture the person you want to forgive. Then imagine that person being happy, imagine that person getting the things that they want in life, let yourself be happy for them. Wish them peace and wish them love and let go. Whenever I’ve done this I’ve felt really good and really at peace afterwards.
Candle Magic: Light a black candle and as it burns let out all of the things that you need to forgive or that need forgiven of you. Allow yourself to let it out of your body like toxins just seeping out. The hurt and anger that you’re holding on to is no longer there to serve you. Let the tears fall if that’s what needs to happen. “Help me to let go of anger. I am ready to let go and find forgiveness within myself. No one is perfect, we all make mistakes, and yet we are all children of the Universe, deserving of love and forgiveness. Today I forgive.”
I Forgive: One of my favorite exercises is from Louise L. Hay’s book You Can Heal Your Life, where you say out-loud, “The person I need to forgive is _____ and I forgive you for ____”. Sounds silly right? Maybe, but it works. You’d be surprised of how many little grudges you are holding on to, or how many things that you thought you’d never forgive that you suddenly realize just don’t matter anymore.
I know that forgiveness happens in it’s own time. Going through the motions of forgiveness because you feel like you are a “bad” person for holding onto a grudge or being angry does more damage than good. You’re allowed to be angry. You are allowed to hold grudges. You’ll know when the time is right for you to let go. When the idea of forgiveness becomes something that makes you feel empowered then it’s time. Listen to your inner voice and you’ll know what to do.
Lots of love to you!