As you know, for 2016 my word-of-the-year is Mend. 2015 was a rough year for me and I find myself needing the three “R”s – Rest, Relaxation, and Recuperation, on an emotional level but also on a physical one. Stress and anxiety can take a lot out of a person emotionally but it can also cause a lot of health issues. Which is why if you are a naturally anxious and stressed out person (hello!!!) you need to do a bit extra to stay sane and healthy.
I am so committed to doing the work. To consciously choosing every day to do the things that make my soul feel lighter and softer. To not push aside “the work” and ignore the spiral until the stress overwhelms me. I go through ups and downs. Sometimes I really have my stress managed and then there are times when I let it get away from me.
The ebb and flow of life, you know?
Last year was all about Depth. Living deeply, experiencing everything, going into the deep end of the pool even when I didn’t quite have the swimming thing down. I didn’t want to be safe or cautious. I wanted to move out of my comfort zone and it was an experience, both good and bad. Deep, real, living. I bought a house, I started a relationship and then ended it, I did and felt and experienced a lot of things that I never had before. Depth taught me a lot and was a huge opportunity for growth.
Right now though, I’m tired of depth, I just want to float on my back and look up at the sunshine and soak it in and let it heal me.
I’m going to share with you a few ways I am honoring my word. Maybe they’re things you can bring into your life too.
Not letting myself be involved in drama/confrontation.
And practicing forgiveness. I’m pretty good at staying drama-free but I’m also an empath and pretty sensitive overall. When people I love get hurt I find myself wanting to stand up for them, even if it’s not my place. I become a fierce mama-bear when it comes to my friends but I know that I need to let them fight their own battles. One of my best friends, a very quiet non-confrontational soul, had a really difficult situation come up in their life and I wanted to fight for them. I held a lot of anger and injustice over the whole thing and I didn’t realize how carrying that burden for them, without being asked to, put a lot of negativity into my soul. Which leads me to the next one.
Letting others help themselves.
I’ve written about this before but it’s still one of those lessons that you sometimes need to learn multiple times. I spent the bulk of 2015 trying to help someone with a serious alcohol problem, stop drinking. I entered the situation knowing that people can only get sober for themselves. When they are ready. So I tried to stay encouraging and supportive. There comes a time when, if you aren’t careful, you get invested. And then you take it personally. It’s pretty hard on the heart. I don’t regret caring or supporting of course. However, I do need to remember, well-intentioned control freak that I am, that I can’t save the world.
I need to learn to shut off more often.
I’m guilty of being one of those people that are always attached to their phone. Before this month, I would wake up and check my e-mail and then Facebook first thing in the morning. I really love the internet. Being the introvert that I am, it allows me to stay connected and be social. Instead of having big chunks of socialization it allows me to socialize at my leisure, in little bites, which is something that I like about it. At the same time I check Facebook and Twitter too often and I’ve noticed that instead of reading on my lunch breaks, I’m more often than not, online. My new goal is to make pre-sleep time, lunch time, and waking up time – phone (and social media) free!