Instructions for a Bad Day!

 I wanted to share these words from the amazing spoken word artist Shane Koyczan for anyone who needs them today. “There will be bad days. Be calm. Loosen your grip, opening each palm slowly now. Let go. Be confident. Know that now is only a moment, and that if today is as bad as it gets, understand that by tomorrow, today will have ended. Be gracious. Accept each extended hand offered, to pull you back from the somewhere you cannot escape….. Despite your instinct to say “it’s alright, I’m okay” – be honest. Say how you feel without fear or guilt, without remorse or complexity… If you think for one second no one knows what you’ve been going through; be accepting of the fact that you are wrong, that the long drawn and heavy breaths of despair have at times been felt by everyone – that pain is part of…

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Anxiety Coping Skill: Hope

Anxiety is usually defined as fear, unease, and worry over things that haven’t happened yet. That’s how I usually experience it in my own life. I will get anxious over things that have already happened, generally whether or not I’ve made the right decision about something or said the wrong thing, but what really causes the anxiety is not knowing what effect those things are going to have on the future. Not knowing the outcome of every decision you make can be kind of daunting when you think about it! Anxiety = fear. I have learned and practiced a lot of different ways to make friends with my own anxiety. I have practiced nearly every anxiety coping skill I’ve come across. (You can find a lot of them in my Anxiety Workbook – Breathe.) Some of them have worked and some of them not so much, but when anxiety comes…

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Know When to Bend : Anxiety & Control

It’s been my experience that when you have anxiety you do one of two things: You give up your control or you cling to it for dear life. I tend to live along the former. I have a strict schedule that I follow. There are certain days allocated to certain chores. I have a set day I hang out with friends. When I lived my life all willy-nilly (the way I imagine “normal” people do) I was anxious all of the time. Structure helps me and it keeps my anxiety mostly in-check. I can actually function, like a human being. But that’s not realistic all of the time. Life happens. I’ve learned that while structure and routine are crucial to managing my anxiety – I also have to be flexible. I have to bend. Keeping hold of control 24/7 and then not being able to handle those curve balls drives me a…

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Dig Deep Into Your Wounds With Big Medicine

Hello sweetlings. I have been having a very rough time of it lately and it is drudging up all sorts of feelings of inadequacy, unworthiness, and just general depression. Sometimes you need to feel sad and hurt. I know this, I believe this. Yet, sometimes those emotions grab you and pull you under until you can’t breathe, until you are seconds away from drowning. When it reaches that point you have to loosen your grip a little. You have to start letting the pain go. I have spent the last three days crying and beating myself up and holding on so hard to self-loathing, hurt, and fear. “You’re all alone. Of course, no one loves you. You’ve never been put first and never will be. If you can’t earn anyone’s love then how broken must you be? If you were smarter, if you had gone to college, if you had…

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